Office Depot Live Chat # 3

Another live chat with Office Depot Customer service.  Enjoy!

Maria: Hi, my name is Maria. It will be my pleasure to assist you today.
You: Hi, I am Lieutenant Scott.  Nice to meet you Maria. How are you on this fine day?
Maria: Welcome to Office Depot Lieutenant Scott. I am doing great, thank you. I hope you are well.
You: Yes, I am very well
You: So look, I need some help shopping -Let me explain
Maria: That sounds wonderful. I will be happy to help you with that.
You: This is going to sound crazy. But I am from the future. I am from the year 2249. Resources have become scarce. Lots of diseases and natural disasters have killed 95% of the world population. I am my community's last hope. They sent me back in time to procure AA batteries.  I need about 35,000 AA batteries.  What is the largest package of batteries that you sell?
Maria: Please allow me to check this for you Lieutenant Scott.
You: Thank you.  My community of mutants, scavengers and cyborgs is grateful
You: 2017 is such an amazing year.  The skies are still blue.  Wild birds everywhere
You: Are you just loving life right now?
Maria: Yes, it has been a  very wonderful and fun year . I love life and also my surroundings.
You: You are a very happy person, Maria.  Not too many of those in the year 2249
Maria: Yes, thank you. I believe, there would be lots of changes in that year Lieutenant Scott .
Maria: May I please know your zip code?
You: 10010
You: Maria, I must say - I am quite surprised.  You are talking to a man from 200 years in the future
You: and you haven't asked any questions
You: A few simple questions about the outcome of sporting events or stock prices could make you rich beyond your wildest dreams
You: I am kind of shocked at your lack of curiosity
Maria: I am sorry,  I was quite fascinated actually on the year that you have come from and how the world looks like.
You: Yeah, it started during the great war of 2019.  Russia annexed Georgia and Tajikistan.  World wars broke out.  Chemical warfare, biological warfare.  All of the animals died.  People went into hiding.  Enjoy the next 2 years.  November 28 2019 everything changes.
You: But anyway, AA batteries - I need 35,000 of them.  How many packages do i need to order
Maria: The scenario you have just describe is really scary.  Anyway, I have further check that we can send you the available quantities only but this may not reach 35,000. Do you happen to have a n exact brand for the batteries
You: i will take any brand - as long as they are alkaline batteries and not rechargeable electric batteries
Maria: This year, there are many inventions that are emerging and crazy ideas are gathered by people. It looks like it is going to be in the scenario that you have just described. Anyway, the items we have (any brand) may not reach 35,000 but you may request for this quantity to be ordered by contacting our
You: Time is short, Maria.  How many batteries can you provide
You: can you provide 20,000 batteries?
Maria: Yes, however, the order may not be placed online since we need to request the quantity to our team .
You: OK I have additional requests
You: I need 1000 bottles of Orange Gatorade.  Our cyborgs use this as fuel
You: Maria.  Where do you keep going? You are taking a very long time to respond.  In the future Office Depot is known for their very quick response times on live customer service chat
Maria: I have checked and it looks like we only have this item 592023 . If you place online order, you can have 5 quantities for this.
You: That is less than 125 bottles.  Our cyborgs will surely perish.  This is also low calorie Gatorade. Did you notice that?  Our Cyborgs are not on a restricted diet
Maria: I apologize for the delay, I need to check the item that you need. Since you have large quantities to order,the only option to request for these is to contact team
You: Ok, I have a few individual requests from my comrades
You: these should be easier to fill
You: Do you have a set of walkie talkies, hand radios or ham radios?
You: My communications guy Derrick is in need of some new equipment
Maria: Yes , we do have walkie talkies ( ) .
You: Derrick is a nice guy, he got his vision upgraded so he can shoot lasers out of his eyes.  Pewwww Pewwww.  That's the sound it makes when he shoots lasers
You: Pewwww pewwww.
You: This is perfect
You: Ok another additional request
You: My wife in the future, Laura, loves gummy candy
You: Gummy candy in the future is scarce
You: She requested I bring gummy candy back with me
You: Do you have any gummy candy?
Maria: I am happy to tell you that we do not have gummy candies available  ( )
You: Welch's fruit snacks!  Incredible
You: In the future Welch's fruit snacks are actually used as currency
You: Maria.  Would you like to come back to the future with me
You: And tell my comrades what it is like to live in 2017
You: I can easily return you after your visit
You: or I can return you to any other time in history
You: Wherever you want to go
You: It is the least I can do after all of this help you have provided me
Maria: I would really love to see what the future looks like Lieutenant Scott but I may need to assist customers in their requests.
You: Here is the beautiful thing about time travel - I can take you right now. But when i return you, I can return you to this exact moment.  So you could spend a year in 2249 but then return to this exact minute when you come back and no one will ever notice you were gone!
You: What do you say? I just need your coordinates.  Latitude and longitude please
Maria: That would be really fantastic but we may need approval from the higher management.  However, May I be of any assistance ?I am happy to help.
You: Management doesn't have to know. To them it will appear like you have been here the entire time.  Let’s say it is 10:00AM. I transfer you to the year 2249.  You spend 10 years there and then I transfer you back to 2017 at 10:00AM on 11/17/2017
You: no one will know you left except for you and my comrades in the future
You: Do you follow?
Maria: Yes, actually its really a very nice and exciting idea Lieutenant Scott. Disappearing without anyone noticing me is cool but it is hard to do I guess.
You: It isn't
You: not for me
You: I just need your coordinates
You: Latitude and longitude please
Maria: I am sorry but we are not allowed to disclose any information . Anyway, Would there be anything else that you would like me to check ?
You: If you provide me this information I can send you forward in time
You: Well, look
You: Is this something you are really interested in? I would be happy to talk to your manager about it
You: As an employee you have the right to ask for things you think could help you in your job
You: whether it's training or what not
You: If your boss doesn't understand this I would be happy to talk to him for you
You: Please put him on the computer
You: so I can have a quick chat with him
Maria: I am afraid that he isn't available as of this moment.
You: Maria, I would like to speak to a manager
You: whether it is your manager or another manager,Please connect me to one
Maria: I will be more glad to check one for you.
You: thank you
Maria: You are welcome and thank you for waiting. Our managers are on the phone but they will be happy to call you back once they are available after the call.
You: I do not own a phone, Maria
You: I am from the future
You: I am on the computer at the library
Maria: How about an email that we can reach you out?
You: that is the best way to contact me
Maria: Great, thank you. I have noted this and will send an email to you directly .
You: watch out
You: Remember than November 28, 2019 is the day everything changes
You: Save yourself! Save yourself!
Maria: Sounds scary Lieutenant Scott. But I will and thank you for your time and advises.
Maria: Is there anything else that I can help you with?I am happy to help.
You: No thank you, I must return to my time now.  My comrades will be very disappointed that I failed them.  I have only been able to procure about 100 batteries and 119 bottles of Orange low calorie Gatorade
You: I return to the future holding my head down in shame
You: Farewell Maria
Maria: I know you can get the items needed. Please email at
Maria: Thank you for chatting us today Lieutenant Scott . I hope you take care  and have a great time always.

If you need further assistance we're available to chat with you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. To end this chat session, please click "Exit Chat" , next to the printer icon, followed by "Close Window"  Thank you for choosing Office Depot.


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